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A Humorous Look at the Bright Side of Cancer... and There Is One

April 28th, 2014

Dear Fran Drescher #4

Biking at Eagle Crest Resort in Oregon April 2, 2014
Biking at Eagle Crest Resort in Oregon
April 2, 2014

Dear Fran,

In my last letter to you, I was telling you about this ShapeUp thing that I had to sign up for because my medical insurance company doesn’t think I have anything better to do than keep track of my weight and how many steps I take in a day. By the way, yesterday, my pedometer fell off in front of the flutist that is playing for the cancer concert on Saturday. It was quite embarrassing.

In addition to keeping track of my weight and how many steps I take (when my pedometer isn’t falling off), I think I told you I was trying to stay away from gluten, dairy, and chocolate—all the foods that seem to hate me. I tell you, this trying to get in shape (and thereby, make my insurance rates go down and try to prevent a recurrence of breast cancer) is a very tiring business.

I think it’s also making me a bit crabby. A few weeks ago, I was playing the card game President with Jonathan (that’s my son) and his girlfriend, Nicole, and his best friend, Isaac. “Hey, Isaac,” I asked, “do you want a chocolate malt?” Dumb question. He loves my malts. In fact, so do I.

I wanted to scream at all three of them, “Enjoy your food while you can, you young whippersnappers! Enjoy that chocolate, dairy, and sugar wrapped up into one nice little malt, because someday soon, you will blink and you will suddenly be eating a little pile of tuna and a strip of lettuce with no dressing just so you can lose one-fourth of a pound!”

I need to get back into hiking and biking. The last time I did either was on our vacation over spring break to Oregon. What kind of exercise do you do? You look fabulous.

Best friends always,

Marie

 

 

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Marie de Haan

Marie de Haan

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