Marie/Maria Project Update #4
“Hi, Marie, haven’t seen you in a while,” Connie, the secretary of my former naturopath, greeted me.
“Do you have my happy pills?” I asked her.
She nodded and slid them across the counter. “By the way, I read your book and it was wonderful. I can’t believe how that chemo knocked you down. You look healthy now, though.”
I handed her my credit card. “I feel great,” I replied. “Now, I’m obsessed with mundane things like losing fifty pounds.” If I had really thought about it, I really only had to lose 45 pounds according to my self-imposed Marie/Maria Project.
“You should talk to this doctor I know about the hCG diet. People are losing a lot of weight.”
Yeah, I don’t think the reason I’m overweight is because I’m deficient in this pregnancy hormone. I think it has a little more to do with my eating too many Trader Joe Dark Chocolate Covered Caramels, too much Haagen-Dazs Rocky Road Ice Cream, Mallard’s Pumpkin Ice Cream, Bit-O-Honey… um… where was I?….
Oh yes, the last time I had pregnancy hormone in my system was over 16 years ago and that’s the way it’s going to stay.
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