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A Humorous Look at the Bright Side of Cancer... and There Is One

Boobie Jokes

September 30, 2010

A Hoot & A Holler

Someone left a comment on my last post saying that it was a “hoot” and my brain wandered toward Hooters. Good thing I have no desire whatsoever to get a job there, ever, because I only have one hoot left.  

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July 28, 2010

My "Boob"

Now that I’ve covered how the chemotherapy has affected my fingernails, toes, and hair, I must talk about my right boob. It is, after all, what got me into all this mess in the first place by getting diseased and having to be surgically removed from my body. Yesterday, I could not figure out why […]

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April 21, 2010

Treat The Whole Person

Yesterday, in meeting with my naturopath, Haley, it was time for my monthly weigh-in. I made sure to go to the bathroom first, removed my shoes, took my coat off, and sure enough, I had still gained seven pounds. I knew I had partied a little too hard on our trip to the Oregon coast […]

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March 29, 2010

That’s Not Something You Hear Every Day #5

Friday’s prosthesis-shopping experience at Nordstrom’s was a huge success… size G, in fact. I didn’t know that bras came in that size. In the dressing room, my friendly fitter had me remove my 12th bra. I took out the new prosthesis, handed it to my friend, and said, “Hey, Vern, can you hold my boob, please?” The […]

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March 26, 2010

Nordstrom, Nordstrom, Here I Come

I haven’t shopped at Nordstrom (very ritzy store) for a long time. I’ve got my Prada purse (Goodwill for $4.00) and $500 Calvin Klein red wool coat ($80 from Ross) and will be leaving any minute (five, to be exact) to meet Vern (best friend) to drop off her kid (cutest kid in the world) […]

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March 23, 2010

That’s Not Something You Hear Every Day #4

Last night, my best friend and I had a rare moment where we actually got together somewhere other than the infusion center. We looked at cameras at Costco and then ended up in the bar at Red Robin. Halfway through our meal, I piped up, “Hey, Vern, you want to go boob-shopping?” I realized later, […]

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March 17, 2010

Post-Mastectomy Shopping

My mom and I were getting ready to leave for Costco. “You’re going out like that?” she asked, pointing to the empty space where my right breast used to be. I thought about explaining to her that Dr. Williamson said it was too soon to “stuff my bra”, but instead told her, “Hmm, I guess I’ll […]

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March 9, 2010

That’s Not Something You Hear Every Day #3

In talking to a dear friend recently–one of my “breast cancer friends”–I learned that I will not be able to lift more than ten pounds ever again with my right arm due to the mastectomy. When I go to Dr. Williamson, Dr. Hoffman, and Haley next week for my various doctor appointments, I could ask […]

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February 26, 2010

That’s Not Something You Hear Every Day #2

Like I said in my last post, Michael went with me to my second Herceptin appointment yesterday. The minute we got in the waiting room, I sneaked down the hallway and weighed myself before the nurse came to get me. All four doctor’s offices have different scales, so, when we got back to the infusion center, […]

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Marie de Haan

Marie de Haan
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